September 26th, 2012 
LeeAnn Last week I was asked by one of my partners to talk to the attorneys at my firm about my blog.
His request set off a battle of conflicting voices within me.
The immediate – “OMG, I have to stand in front of 60 attorneys and talk about ME???”
Then, of course, the responsible … “LeeAnn, this would be good for you. You need to do this.”
And the rebel, “I am 45, I don’t need to do anything I don’t want to do.”
The insecurity came out with “no one is going to find this interesting.”
Apparently, the pleaser won the war, as I heard myself say, “if you would like me to do this, I will do so.”
In six (6) days (not that I am counting), I will stand in front of a large (in my opinion) group of attorneys and, for twelve (12) (not that I will be counting) minutes, their attention will be focused on … me.
I can hear many of you saying, “piece of cake” … “no problem” … “twelve minutes is nothing.”
Something is wrong with me then.
Seriously, even typing out this blog post is making me nervous.
It is not like I haven’t done it before. I have given speeches in the past on numerous occasions.
Some have been on topics absolutely foreign to me, such as the Georgia ad valorem taxes. (Thank you Marvin Fentress.) I prepared for months for the presentation and somehow muddled my way through it. I don’t remember anything about what I said, but I do remember having an out-of-body experience for much of the forty-five minutes.
I argued in front of the Third Circuit Court of Appeals in Philadelphia as a second year attorney. Talk about stressful. It might as well have been in front of the Supreme Court. It was me, in front of a panel of old distinguished judges, with a full courtroom behind me. I threw up both before and after the argument. (Luckily, neither time was in the actual courtroom.) I also tripped over someone’s briefcase on the way out. I ended up winning, but let me assure you, with no modesty involved, that my then three-year old nephew could have won the argument. It was a slam dunk case – which is why it was given to a second year associate.
I have spoken on topics dear to me, which is a little bit easier, but still incredibly nerve-wracking. Ironically after I decided that trial work was not for me, I gave a speech in front of the Michigan State Supreme Court Justices, the Governor of Michigan, and other politicians, accepting an honor on behalf of a loved one. I am pretty sure I visibly shook.
I am hoping that these past experiences make this one easier for me.
It is on a topic I know.
There will be no elected officials or esteemed jurists present.
I have learned my lessons and will not eat beforehand. I will clear my paths of obstacles.
I have tried all of the standard tips including employing yoga breathing and talking directly to one person. Frankly, there are only two things that seem to help me: (i) beer; and (ii) if people ask questions. For some reason, beer gives me strong nerves. I probably shouldn’t disclose this, but after a beer or two, I will pretty much do anything, with no fear.
Since beer is not an option for next week (or at least not one that I want to pursue), I am hopeful that my audience will be interactive. For some reason, that works to calm me.
Maybe it is because it distracts me.
Although, of course, that assumes that I know the answer to the question posed. (Maybe I should request that you ask me an easy question.)
I used to think with practice and/or age, this would get easier.
Here’s hoping that it finally will.
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I’m quite the opposite. I don’t think I’ve ever met a crowd of people whose audience I didn’t want to capture and (more likely than not) bore the pants off of them. 😉
I think it’s really cool that you’re going to talk about your blog. Here are the top five reasons why:
1. It’s a really good blog, full of yummy recipes, insight, and photos
2. It shows the rest of the world just what a cool person you are
3. It inspires others to share their own insights, yummy recipes, and photos
4. You’re a very good public speaker (I have heard you!)
5. It’s an excuse to buy a new outfit.
🙂
Jenn – you are masterful at public speaking. I am going to try to channel you. Thank you for the encouragement and can’t wait to see you SOON!!!
I’m sorry I won’t be there (physically) to support you, but I know you will be great and wish I could hear and see you.
Mer – you have been in my thoughts so much lately. I will email you to catch up. Miss you!
I’m with Jenn. I know you will be awesome, but it’s easy for me to say when I don’t have to be the one presenting. I can get very nervous when presenting, depending on topic and audience, so I do understand what you’re experiencing. If questions are comforting for you, perhaps open it up with one. Something like: what is their existing experience and/or perception of blogs? What do they think your is about? What do they think it the hardest challenge you’ve faced about writing your blog? If you start with just one question and get a few responses, it could lightened the mood, get them engaged, and give you material to address.
I wish you much success though you won’t need. You go there with lots of skills, knowledge, and most especially, your genuine self, which is the best thing going!
Robin – that advice is ingenious!!! Seriously, I think I will start out with a question to get the ball rolling. Thank you thank you thank you! Been catching up on your posts lately and taking notes. As I go into a completely different type of managerial role, your tips are even more valuable. Hugs to Grace!
I have the same feat. Realizing I had a 45 second alleyot for my children’s bat/bar mitzvahs, I freaked. In an effort to confront my fear, I went to a counselor for guidance and was advised to imagine that the entire congretation was naked. Say what? About a month ago I was told by our new Rabbi that he, too, had a fear of public speaking (huh???) and his grandfather’s advice was that the congretation was and is there rooting him on; we are his cheering section. You will be talking with colleagues who respect and admire you (as do I). All will be rooting and cheering for you. Drink three beers, have fun, and do NOT imagine them sitting naked!
Thank you my friend! I have heard the naked suggestion – or imagining them in their underwear. That does absolutely nothing for me. Interesting about the cheering section!!
LeeAnn,
I’ll be there cheering you on. As they say in show business, “break a leg.” You’ll do a great job!
Love your blog, BTW…
Shonah – I love that you are going to be there!! I will feel your positive vibes and it will be all good!
As Ben Franklin said. “Beer is proof that God loves us.” What happened?