I just finished a three day fruit fast.
The fast is part of the 40 Days to Personal Revolution, a program put on by my yoga studio and based on the book of the same name by Baron Baptiste.
During the last three days, I ate nothing but fruit.
During the last three days, I drank no coffee or any other caffeinated beverage.
I am still processing this journey, but in the meantime, here are my immediate thoughts and observations:
1. I have never thought about food as much as I thought about it in the past three days. In fact, I don’t think I have ever thought about anything as much as I thought about food in the past three days.
2. The fact that zucchini is a fruit really doesn’t help me. And don’t get me started on “faux pasta” made from scraping a zucchini. I am pretty sure that could get you killed in Philadelphia.
3. Grocery stores are not my friend when I am on a fruit fast. I normally eat healthy foods – vegetarian, whole grains, low fat. All of a sudden, the twinkies and ding-dongs were calling my name.
4. I can be a serious
bitch witch when I am hungry and under-caffeinated. Perhaps that explains why my husband had to leave town suddenly for a trial (“dear, don’t they schedule those things way in advance??”).
5. Since when is something that is mushy and brownish-green considered ripe for eating? Avocados are edible only when they are part of guacamole and served with chips and a cold beer with a lime stuck in it.
6. I am sure that this is related to #4, but the people who enjoyed the fruit fast seriously got on my nerves.
7. Again probably related to #4, but I am not sending Baron Baptiste a holiday card or inviting him to my birthday party.
8. I found myself oddly envious of people who had the flu. At least then I wouldn’t be hungry.
9. I figured out why you can’t have caffeine during the fast, even though TECHNICALLY coffee is a fruit (trust me, I researched it). It is so that the pounding headache you get from the caffeine withdrawal will take your mind off the fact that your internal organs are digesting themselves.
10. And, finally, have you ever smelled a mango fart? My English Bulldog left the bedroom last night.